To the People of the State of New York. George Burns, Age is an issue of mind over matter. It's time to say goodbye, but I think goodbyes are sad, and I'd much rather say hello. The retired guy goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, I ache all over. helpful non helpful. The Beatles are well-known enough to be a great choice for a retirement party. Add some lighthearted sarcasm and entertaining tidbits by drawing on famous retirement quotes and sayings from comedic characters, Marvel heroes, favorite reality stars, and more: Bowery King: "You're not very good at retiring. Discover and share Police Retirement Quotes Funny. The public are the police and the police are the public, and both share the same responsibility for community safety. If you give one of these to a colleague, friend, or family member that is looking forward to retirement, it will surely help you communicate your appreciation. Congratulations. Something pretty thats just the surface. We wish you the best of luck It means choice." God bless the officers I work with. The police told me they'd throw me in jail the next time they caught me stealing board games. "Retirement: When you stop lying about your age and start lying around the house." -Unknown "My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law." -Jerry Seinfeld "Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. I'm still not retired." To me a job is an invasion of privacy." When I was sixty-five I still had pimples." -George Burns Police say they have nothing to go on. Show your appreciation with unique quotes or personalized logos. Retirement is not a life without purpose; it is the ongoing purpose that provides meaningfulness. It is the beginning of the open highway." - Author Unknown Funny retirement cake sayings are always a big hit (though not always appropriate for a workplace event). Go make the most of your days and enjoy your retirement. Present This to You as a Symbol of on the next chapter in your life, Unknown, Far from idleness being the root of all evil, it is rather the only true good. 4.5 out of 5 stars (455) $ 15.00 FREE shipping Add to Favorites Retirement Gifts. 30. A personalized best wishes and inspirational quote is an ideal way to honor the retiring police officer who spent his or her lifetime protecting and serving the community. Funny retirement teacher retirement party police sarcastic police humor funny jokes facebook status it is what it is funny facebook status jobs sarcasm smart alec. Your tireless work ethic and The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. Jonathan Clements, I have never liked working. SO I RETIRED AND FOUND I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB! 35. May you enjoy your retirement! Goodbye Tension - Hello Pension! So I do it three or four times a day." POLICE OFFICER WIFE, Personalized, Prayer. A police officer arrested a bottle of water because it was wanted in three different states. "I'm the police, and I'm here to arrest you. One of my favorite parts of planning retirement parties is the opportunity to get all punny and think up funny cake sayings for retirement and invites. It is the only pleasure I have left. Author Unknown, Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save. The officer cuts him off, "Sir, you were going twice the speed limit, I'm going to issue a ticket." Insistent, the man pleads, "Please! You may also share these fun retirement quotes. Call the Police. I believe in financial retirement. Many folks think they arent good at earning money, when what they dont know is how to use it. Vince Lombardi, "The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off." Enjoy your new 7 day weekend Share this quote on facebook send via mail. as He inspires you every day. Our top 50 retirement quotes, wishes and sayings are useful for retirement cards. Anonymous With Great Honor and Recognition How Much Do I Need?, Net Worth? What do you say when your friend wants to hear a really cool joke about the police from you? All the best!". and may you find joy and peace As long as youre working, you stay young. The best part about is that they will be relatable to just about. Upon retirement, you will take the long walk . If you look at what you have in life, youll always have more. 6. Hello Pension. George Burns, You dont stop laughing when you grow old, you grow old when you stop laughing. The best funny retirement wishes for coworkers and colleagues include: The days of 9-5 are past! Catherine Pulsifer, "Retirement: No job, no stress, no pay!" We have now done so much for so long with so little, we are now capable of doing anything with nothing. And, of course, there have to be a few funny letter boards and signs! You are one of the hardest workers I have ever known. ", "There is a whole new kind of life ahead, full of experiences just waiting to happen. Voltaire, The question isnt at what age I want to retire, its at what income. Jerry Seinfeld, "Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When Cops Retire. Retirement memes: Sometimes the good old joke gets, well, old. Their names are Bed and Couch. "John Wick: "I'm workin' on it." - John Wick: Chapter 2. ), or just manually add the email addresses you'd like to keep in your contact list. How Did You, by C. A. Lynch How did you get to retire before me? Police Begin Campaign To Run Down Jaywalkers, A truck driver was driving along on the freeway and noticed a sign that read: Low Bridge Ahead. Hugh Hefner, Often when you are at the end of something, youre at the beginning of something else. Betty Sullivan, "Retirement is not the end of the road. 20 Cops Memes Humor In 2020 Cops Humor Police Humor Cop Jokes . What is five times five?" "Wednesday," replies Jenkin man. They aren't going to get rid of me that way. What are the four food groups for cops? When I was 65, I still had pimples. George Burns, You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream. C.S. Steve Young, A retired husband is often a wifes full-time job. Larry Laser, "Working people have a lot of bad habits, but the worst of these is work." All the best! Officer: I notice your eyes are bloodshot. Harry Vardon, Theres never enough time to do all the nothing you want. Discover and share police retirement quotes funny. Carolyn Leigh and Cy Coleman, Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under trees on a summers day, listening to the murmur of the water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time. Mario Puzo, You can be young without money but you cant be old without it. Did you hear about the two peanuts who walked through a bad neighborhood? Search, discover and share your favorite Retirement GIFs. 5. A word of warning. May the wife have a happy time. You've done your hard time and now it's time to enjoy some freedom! The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. Police departments should continue to hire individuals of the highest possible character, so that young people look at the police in their cities and towns and say, "I want to be like that." "I've missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. Alan Lakein, 7 ways to bring your future into the present, Preparation for old age should begin not later than ones teens. Officer: I have to give you a ticket for not wearing your glasses. Driver: Officer, I have contacts. Officer: I dont care who you know, youre still getting a ticket.. Ward, Always have a plan, and belive in it. 29. I guess he wants a rematch because hes been following me for about 45 minutes. Funny Retirement Quotes. 4. Every time you borrow money, youre robbing your future self. your many years of sacrifice and service. He says to the man, Were going to have to give you a drug test. Without hesitation, the man replies, Cool, which drugs are we testing?, 8. Brainyquote has been providing inspirational quotes since 2001 to our worldwide community. Quote Mug. Hartman Jule, "I have never liked working. Enjoy your freedom! On what show do police officers solve crimes committed by garden gnomes? "May all the years ahead bring you great joy and relaxation.". What is small, has a long tail and works with the police? Me: I'd like to interview the bartender wearing high heels and a leopard print dress. May you enjoy every minute of your retirement. Here are 25 retirement quotes for the next phase of your life: Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. Good Luck with Your Retirement which is going to haunt you. more on this quote . The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, 'Got stuck, huh?'. Discover and share police retirement quotes funny. 10. Funny quotes Retirement quotes The rolling contract was designed to specifically take away some of that retirement talk and retirement issue. Unknown, Expect the best. Check out our funny police quotes selection for the very best in unique or custom, handmade pieces from our prints shops. No matter your connection to or feelings for cops, police jokes will have the whole family laughing. Hi Pension. Junior Seau. Live well and prosper. - Greg Tamblyn " You gain two new best friends upon your retirement. Its learning to live on less than you make, so you can give money back and have money to invest. A woman was speeding down the road and was pulled over by a female police officer. Did you hear they arrested the Energizer bunny? Oliver Wendell Holmes, The best is yet to come! Happy retirement wishes! Henry Moore, Musicians dont retire; they stop when theres no more music in them. Your email address will not be published. Funny Retirement Card For Men and Women, Retirement Cards For Him Or Her, Single Large 5.5 x 8.5 Happy Retirement Cards For Women, Large Retirement Card For Coworker - Karto - You've Worked 32 $849 FREE delivery Wed, Feb 15 on $25 of items shipped by Amazon Unknown Army food: the spoils of war Unknown Friendly fire - isn't. Unknown 2) Old age, fragile bones, doctor visits, medical checkups and a weak bladder - are you still looking forward to retirement? Officer: No, I am an undercover detective. Tourist: So, why are you in uniform? Officer: Today is my day off.. The job you waited for for 50 years! Vince Lombardi, Retirement is the ugliest word in the language. Retirement is not impossible, get ahead with these tips to get ready! We go. When a career marked by life on the beat winds to a close, mere celebration isnt enough. For retirement planning, you should consider other It's time to work on your golf game, enjoy retirement! Robert Benchley, If people concentrated on the really important things in life, thered be a shortage of fishing poles. Unknown, "The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does." of loyal and dedicated service to 36. Ella Harris, You have to put off being young until you can retire. Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe, Cessation of work is not accompanied by cessation of expenses.
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